The Letter That Never Got Sent

Dear Breakstone,

I have been an enthusiastic consumer of you Breakstone 2% Cottage cheese product for almost 2 years now. I tried almost every product on the market before settling on yours. I was on a quest for the perfect texture, taste, and consistency. Truthfully, when I tried yours, I knew I was home. However, these past few months have proven to be a troublesome time. Are you mis-treating the cows?? Three times in the past 6 months, I have opened up a container of cottage cheese, excited to delight in the sensory overload which only Breakstone can produce, to find myself, only seconds after putting a heaping spoonful in my mouth, spitting it all over the counter/sink/self. It was horrendous!

It tasted like I was suckling off a cow's teet and a pasty white sludge was draining into my shocked palate. Do you not have taste testers at your mythical dairy factory? Are there not rigid standards which must be adhered to before your products get sent out into the market? I thought maybe the first container was a fluke; an oversight by the higher-ups perhaps. But three?? That is more than mere coincidence. I demand quality in all of my dairy products. Until you fix whatever troubles may be plaguing you staff, your cows, or (dare I say) you staff-cows, I will be switching brands. I know that I will not enjoy my breakfast as much, but at least it will be consistent and I won't be retching in disgust for the rest of the day. Please return to the high standard of quality that I know you can achieve.
Sincerely,
A disappointed customer.

PS. There is a possibility I could be paid off with a lifetime supply of cottage cheese.